I was not so tired the other day that I dropped a toothpaste cap into the open drain in my bathroom sink. I did not then live with a severely clogged sink for weeks. I did not bathe my baby in that same sink when it wouldn't drain very well. I did not then remember the perfectly clean plunger we had purchased but meant to return to Lowe's that was sitting in the garage. I did not ask my husband to plunge the sink, at which point he did not forget, wait several days, finally rememer, and pull all sorts of nasty stuff out of our drain. At least the sink drains now, though.
Also, I was not so out of it in the middle of the night last night that when Ilse started crying, I turned the lamp on and looked for a way to 'turn her off'. When I couldn't find it, I did not assume, in my sleeplessness induced state of insanity, that the base to the baby monitor was missing. I did not search for it on the floor. I did not wake Tim up, tell him the base was missing, and have him search for it because we 'need it!' I also did not then get all the way to Ilse's room and be in the middle of changing her diaper before I realized how confused I'd been. Tim, thankfully, had more sense. He only looked for a few seconds untill he realized that I was, in essense, absolutely crazy.
I did not decide to write this post on Sunday because I knew I'd forget by Monday, which is when Not Me posts are supposed to be written.
Nope. Not me.