Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Bam-Bam

Today I noticed something about Bam-Bam.  He is terrified of people he doesn't know.  We went up to Covenant Kids today to say hello to our dear friend Pam, and Bam-Bam lost his smile, his sweet face, and his friendly talkativeness.  The mask came down and he was wary and quiet.

And on Sunday when sweet Auntie Dee tried to hug him, he just looked at me out of the corner of his eye with a look that said, SAVE ME, MOMMY!!!!

And at Kohl's he had a very hard time conversing with the checkout lady.  He just didn't want to talk to her.

Then, we went to Olive Garden tonight and Bam-Bam actually tried to hide behind me when the hostess tried to interact with him.  The hostess concluded he was shy, but I don't think it's shyness.


Even though he looks mad and rude, he's just terrified.  What is he terrified of?  He's afraid the person will take him away, probably.  Also, he doesn't know if they will hurt him. 


I don't think this kid needs a lesson in Stranger Danger.... not that Dee's a stranger, but he just doesn't know her very well, yet.  (We've gotta fix that, Dee.)  This child just needs his parents, and he needs them pretty much constantly.


I love being his mommy, and I don't mind the neediness, but it is something we're going to have to work through, since he can't be this way forever.


Another thing about Bam-Bam.  He just doesn't look where he's going.  I've prevented him from certain death (or at least massive head trauma) many, many times, and I am constantly looking down at him to see where he is looking.  I don't know how many times I've pressed his wrist with my pinky fingernail and said "Look in front of you!"  But he just won't remember.  He is much too much interested in what is going on around him.  So, I'm going the natural consequences route.  On one of the last shopping trips we took, I would notice he wasn't watching and step in front of him so he'd hit my nice soft butt and get knocked backwards.  Obviously this gentle form of consequence didn't work, so I'm on the look out for a relatively flat surface that I can let him walk into to make him understand that he has to look in front of him.  Sounds so mean, but he has GOT to learn.  I'd rather him not run into a sharp object and cut himself just because I'm looking in front of ME instead of watching where he is walking, so I've got to get him to learn very, very soon.  I tried to have him run into our car tonight on our way out from Babies R Us, but he looked in time and sidestepped it.  Darn.  :)

1 comment:

  1. LOL - I'm sorry- the bit about the car just cracked me up. I know the feeling from working with toddlers - you still have to keep a careful eye to make sure they don't really hurt themselves - but you've got to let them experience a little consequence to teach them. Bam Bam definitely sounds like he still has "one foot in heaven"...not entirely on earth yet. He'll come around. Maybe setting up some work to engage his attention and teach him to focus would help. It can be something simple, like stringing beads (or hollow noodles) or ladling water between two vessels of water. If he practices concentrating on one thing, it might translate to a better awareness of things around him.

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